Friday, July 25, 2008


So, with today's spectacular disappointment on the adoption front (STUPID, STUPID, STUPID SUSAN), what I really wanted to do was bury my face in a trough full of the worst foods available. I had dreams of deep fried everything: pizza, ice cream, french fries, fried dough, hell, I'd have deep fried my own hair and ate it.

This is how I deal with stress and emotional upset. I eat. A lot. And I made a list of foods I was prepared to eat, devil be damned. I wanted KFC--a full bucket of chicken, a quart of mashed potatoes and gravy, I wanted a peanut butter cup sundae from Friendly's, and then I'd make a stop over at the Chinese buffet for a pile of crab rangoons and egg rolls, before going to the fair for cotton candy, fried dough, and if I was lucky, Dippin Dots.

But I hadn't counted on one minor little stumbling block in the road to total meltdown: my husband.

And he was hearing none of this insurrectionist, defeatist talk from me. No sir. He really drew the line when I lay in bed giggling over deep frying pizza, something I've never done but today was quite convinced wouldn't be hard and would probably be quite tasty. Not happening in this household, I was informed. He would take me to dinner, but it had to be within what I was allowed.

Grumble, grumble, I decided I wanted a Friendly's sundae for dinner. 17 of my 21 points. But I could eat it if I wanted to.

"Cookies, that is not dinner!" I was informed.

"But I waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaant it!"

How about a little cheese with that whine?

"You did not put in all this work these past 2 months to blow it in one night."


So finally, I went on the computer and started tabulating what I could eat. I wanted a deep dish pizza from Uno's. 17 points for A THIRD of the Uno Original personal size.

And I knew if I got started, I was going to clean my plate.

So we settled on Applebee's. I had a 3 course dinner for the 17 points that pizza would have cost me. Over dinner the General asked how I was enjoying my chicken sandwich, and I said, "Well, it'd be better if it was fried." He just laughed at me. He actually laughed at me!!!

But I got the last laugh with their chocolate raspberry cake. Mmmm... It almost filled in the gaping hole left in my psyche by the memory of that PB cup sundae.

Damn him for getting on board anyway!!!


Talmadge Gleck said...

He loves you.

And he's right. :-)

What I don't understand myself is why I haven't had uncontrollable cravings for, i.e. Golden Corral, Tuesday night $5.99 large one-item Domino's, KFC, or whatever point-explodin' foodage.

It's just the "munchie" items that sometimes tempt me to bend or break The Format.

So far, I haven't gone over daily or weeklies. How, I don't know.

Be strong. Words I have to follow myself until the first gold rings:
1) 10% (I'm 4.9 pounds away from it)
2) People I don't see often actually NOTICING.
3) Tangible evidence of this removal.

We're all in this together, my friend.

Melissa said...

Ah yes, the cravings....when the going gets tough the tough go to the Food Court!

I have found the internet to be very helpful here. When I feel like I just have to have 5 Guys or a Quarter Pounder I simply go online and see how many calories are in said item and that pretty much ruins it for me. If I do eat whatever it is that I want, I will often check the calorie count after, that usually makes me feel very guilty, but that's a good motivator too - I know it will be a long time before I crave that particular food!